People are generally nosy. Well, at least that's my impression of the human race. I have always told others if I think something they are wearing or doing is pretty/interesting, etc. I try to never ask any questions about what they are doing or wearing. Others don't seem to have a problem asking though. How does this all relate to the title of this post?
I wear a necklace that Mark bought for me in Dubai at the gold market. It has my name in Arabic on the front and his on the back. I have had it for several years and have worn it often. I had it on the day he had his heart attack. I wore it to the UAE. When I found his wedding band on the table next to his bed, I put the ring on the necklace. (He apparently took it off and left it in the dish by his bed when Dave took him to the hospital.) I wore them that way until about 2 months ago, when I had to move the ring to my finger. I have lost enough weight that my rings were sliding off my finger. Mark's band is a tiny bit smaller than my rings and it works to hold mine in place. I am just not ready to take them off yet.
Prior to October, I rarely received a comment about my necklace. Since then, it seems like a beacon for people to ask about! (Or maybe I am just more sensitive to it.) Now, if they just said it was interesting or pretty, it wouldn't be so bad. But, they don't leave it at that, they ask about it. I give a vague answer and prepare myself for the point in the conversation when I have to tell them. It almost always happens.
Last night while talking to Jenn and Phil, I gave that moment in time the name of "Widow Card". Some of the time, it can't be helped because people are nosy and just keep asking. They back you into a corner and you can't avoid playing the 'Card'. I hate it because it makes me feel bad, they usually feel terrible and I don't want to make people uncomfortable if I can avoid it. But, boy it sure is a show stopper! It will end the conversation immediately. The only thing you get after that is a chorus of "I'm sorry".
Now I will admit, there are times that I think about playing that 'card'. When you get a really obnoxious clerk at the store, I stand there thinking about playing the 'card' to get them to shut up! It's terrible and like I said, I don't want to cause others any pain, but sometimes.....
Just to make matters worse, now I am getting comments about my rings. I had a store clerk ask me the other day, if they were all one ring or separate bands. I told her they were separate bands and my diamond. Then, I waited for the question about why I had two of the same bands. I must have had that 'don't ask look' in my eye, because she made eye contact and didn't ask any more questions. So, I guess I either have to perfect the 'don't ask look' or get over upsetting people and play the 'card'. You just gotta love those kind of choices in life! Not really.